are you there, goddess? it's me, stephanie.

one of my current classes is HUM/130 - religions of the world.  i was kind of stoked to take this class.

okay, REALLY stoked.  i love politely discussing religion and sharing my ideas and interpretations with other open minded people.  note that i said OPEN MINDED people.  that may be important later in the story.

well, it's not actually a STORY per se.  more just me bitching about things.  and stuff.

now, my class blocks are nine weeks long and i take two classes at a time.  week 1 in my religion class was 'effects of religion'.  we had to talk about psychologists and philosophers and their views on religion (waste. of. time. if you ask me). i got sad and angry because i lost A LOT of points on a project because the facilitator doesn't know how to properly pose a fucking question.  SUCH AS insinuates like examples.  discuss some bright colors SUCH AS pink, blue,  and yellow would mean discuss colors that are bright, like pink, blue,  and yellow are.  i could discuss whatever fucking color i wanted to.  discuss some bright colors INCLUDING pink, blue, and yellow would mean discuss pink and yellow you asshole.  the facilitator put SUCH AS so i discussed pink, purple, and lime green.  and she only gave me credit for pink and said 'i don't think you got the point of the assignment.  purple and lime green are interesting, but not what i asked for'. 

um, what?

so i was all like 'such as insinuates that you offered examples, etc'. like just what i typed up there.  she was all 'i'll consider it' and then gave me 28/30 instead of the original 14/30.

but still, i have an 88 in that class at that point.  which will COMPLETELY FUCK my 4.0.  i know, i know.  a 3.8 wouldn't kill me.  but if i'm going to do something, i'm going to DO IT and i want my damn 4.0.

so week 2 is indigenous peoples.  which is interesting to me because christianity all but wiped out most indigenous cultures worldwide. 

but don't tell christians that. 

there were actually 'classmates' of mine who were like 'indigenous people believed in many gods because christian God had not yet shown Himself to them'.

ergh... what?

so that is basically how my week 2 went.  slightly entertaining, very frustrating, and lots of rewriting responses to my classmates so i don't come off as hating christians (because i totes don't).

this week is week 3 and we're learning about hinduism, which is much more up my alley.  i'm a bit bummed that neo-paganism isn't touched on at all, but there was mention of 'new age'.  i'm desperately hoping that paganism and/or wicca isn't shoved in there as it usually is.

psychology class is much less frustrating.  it's more challenging to me, and i'm enjoying it even though i'm not doing perfectly.  i have like 94% in that class and am back up to 90% in religion, so if i really stick to it and try to get full credit on everything, i might eek out an A in each class. 

in other news, jake can't stop biting his butt and has to wear one of those hysterical collars now.  long story, expect photos though.  he had a wound back when we still lived in florida that was healing and then was not healing and then was healing and is now not healing again and he picks at it and chews at it.  so he's wearing a fashionable collar now that we're hoping to sign with sharpies like it was a cast in elementary school.

and finally, be prepared for the blog entry of all blog entries coming up soon.  i've been saving this since last april and we are nearing completion.  that ought to wet your collective whistles for a bit.  trust me, it will be worth it.

things that really crumble my cinnamon coffee cake.

i made a delicious (boxed) cinnamon coffee cake yesterday. DELICIOUS.  and i was enjoying it's orgasmic cinnamony sweetness when i noticed a facebook friend had posted a link to a youtube video about glenn beck's 8/28 'restoring honor' event.

don't worry, i'm not getting all glenn-beck-hatey on you today.  this is not a political cake-crumbling.

it's a religious one.

which is SO much better, i know.

ANYWAY.  the airspace over much of d.c. is restricted, including over the washington monument and mall area.  where the 'restoring honor' event was taking place.  however, a flock of geese flew over the mall during the event, and many people are taking this as a sign that god himself is 'pleased with our efforts to maintain truth and freedom for america.'

huh.  feel free to click or not click.  there are tons of different videos of this on youtube, but this is the one i saw.

many of the videos of the goose 'flyover' mention that it's the hand of god.  it's not a coincidence.  that god knows that the majority of this country is christian and trying to bring the country as a whole back to god.  etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.  insert whatever far right, superchristian bollocks you prefer.

please consider my numbered list as to why these geese are NOT demonstrating anything about a christian god, nor his/her approval/disapproval for glenn beck, christianity, washington d.c., republicans, democrats, etc.

1.  the area between the lincoln memorial and the washington monument is a long, straight, fairly open area.  so the winds there are probably really fun for birds to fly in.  the topography and buildings could cause air thermals and shit like that.  and seriously, even if it didn't, that is an epic flight path for any bird to take.

2.  these are CANADIAN geese.  even if a christian god was all like, 'dude, glenn beck is ON POINT and totally right, AMERICA FUCK YEAH!!' would he, in all his infinite wisdom and awesomeness, send some kind of AMERICAN bird to fly over?  preferably a bald eagle?  or at the very least, a flock of seagulls or pigeons?  some bird that is not specifically NAMED after a country that is not america?  

3.  also, geese like water.  there is a HUGE reflecting pool there.  maybe there were on their way migrating somewhere (not unheard of, that migration thing) and remembered there was a sweet ass spot to stop for a rest and a drink.  and changed their minds when they saw the people.  probably not, but i love canadian geese and like to think that they think like me.  HOWEVER.  geese fly in formation like that while migrating.  and canadian geese migrate north to south, stopping in the summer where it's cooler and stopping in the winter where it is warmer.  they do not have specific migratory paths or places they stop - it's different for each group of geese.  i think it's pretty obvious that these geese were on their way somewhere fun.

4.  if a christian god sends flocks of geese over places where things are going on that he approves of... like, if he specifically sent those geese to fly over the rally to say 'CHRISTIAN GOD APPROVED', then he TOTALLY loved my pagan handfasting/wedding.

that's right.  you might know i'm a pagan (and if you didn't, now you do) or witch or neo-pagan or whatever.  when i married awesome husband just over six years ago (our anniversary was like two weeks ago) we had an outdoor ceremony by a lake at sunset, because we're pagans.  we like shit like that.  we had a handfasting, which is basically a pagan wedding and our hands were tied together and i think it was really awesome and moving and even our 'enthusiastic' christian guests (read: born again) thought it was a touching ceremony (and didn't even question the 'god and goddess' thing).  

so, here we are, all pagan and shit, being handfasted and not believing in a christian god.  when a few geese fly over our wedding ceremony, honking the whole way, and land on the other side of the lake.  

SCORE!  CHRISTIAN GOD APPROVED MY NON-CHRISITAN/PAGAN WEDDING!

i'd like to see the religious glenn-beckers stick that in their pipes and smoke it (legally, of course).

in sort of related news, i also prayed to christian god in church about my religious future days before i came to paganism.  i was raised christian, and truly believe it's all the same shit with different names.  i went to church and knelt and prayed with all my heart because what the church was telling me just wasn't making sense and didn't feel right.  i had studied some other religions, mainly paganism and wicca, and asked christian god to show me what path i was supposed to be on, what path would sit well with me and give me comfort and allow me to try and experience life and love the way i was supposed to.  mere days later, someone handed me the book 'living wicca' by scott cunningham and before i even opened the book, it just FELT like a sign.  if you've never been aware of having a 'prayer' answered, it's a hard feeling to describe.  but i felt at that moment like christian god was telling me, 'dude, you're right - it's all the same.  this is the path that will resonate with you.'

and christian god, in his infinite wisdom and awesomeness, was right.

bet you didn't see that one coming, did you?  i have no problems with christianity - it's just not for me.  the problem i have with some christians is that they are not christians - they do not live as christ would have.  they are mean and hateful and judgemental, and what is worse is that they use their 'christian' values as a way to continue being mean and hateful and judgmental.

/endrant.

anyway, i have to go finish up my paper on the origins on body piercing.  deadlines and all that.  mom's going to new york for a job interview and she leaves tomorrow.  so tonight i'll be helping her pack and making sure that everything's good to go and quite possibly having a few drinks.

and eating more cinnamon coffee cake.

i have thin, zombie-like skin

i was slightly intoxicated last weekend (read: shitfaced) and don't remember too much.  which is why we will not be drinking entire pitchers of pina coladas in 3 hours while taking pristiq EVER AGAIN.  and apparently i thought it would be a great idea to pick at my skin.  i had (yes, HAD) this like weird spot of skin on my arm that was like kind of raised, but not a mole.  well.  it's gone now.


that's right.  and i'm left with a strange bit of skin that is shaped like africa and may or may not be zombified.  it's quite terrifying, actually.  i've doused it with hydrogen peroxide and put a&d ointment on it to no avail.  i may try windex next.  and it hurts.  and it may be getting infected.  just so you all know, if i am zombified i plan to do the honorable thing and eat sarah palin, glenn beck, and rush limbaugh before letting awesome husband chop my head off.


so i'm on day 4 of college.  and they do actually have the days numbered: week 1, 2, 3, etc.  monday is day 1, sunday day 7.  and classes are 9 weeks long.  i submitted my first assignment yesterday.  in ENG101 we will be writing an expository essay.  1500-1750 words.  double spaced.  cite references... wait a minute...


I'M DOING A RESEARCH PAPER!! if you are reading this and went to luhi, you already know.


we had to do one every year in my middle/high school, except senior year.  so i did five of these already.  our teachers would have us choose from a list of topics and like once a week we'd have to hand in part of it.  like, an outline.  and then those damn index cards, because that's how we were supposed to organize the paper.  each index card would have like a sentence or thought on it.  then you'd put them in order and use them to write your paper.  


now, i always have been controversial, and i can prove it to you by my choices in research paper topic.  seventh grade: cocaine (foreshadowing, anyone?).  eighth grade: teen pregnancy.  ninth grade: creationism vs. evolutionism (and i went to a lutheran school). tenth grade: i was too high to remember what i did.  sorry.  and in eleventh grade we had to choose an american author, so i chose jack london.


my ENG101 prof gave us a list to choose from.  one of the options was 'healthy eating'.  one was 'oil and gas prices'.  and one was 'tattoos and body piercings'.


guess what i chose.


it gets better. we had to explain how we planned on narrowing down our topic.  so i decided to narrow it down by historical use and meaning of body piercing.  and have already used the word 'genitals' in a college assignment.  literally MY FIRST ASSIGNMENT.  that has to be some kind of win.


but i'm hoping to write it on ye olde reasons of piercing.  like the lip and labret piercing/stretching commonly done in south and central america.  the nipple piercing in europe during (i think) the 1500's.  and the genital piercings of the royals in the 19th century (like the prince albert.  who was a real person).


of course, i'm also terribly sensitive.  and need to stop being aggrieved when classmates talk about god and wishing us a blessed day.  because i guess that's okay.  right?  it's not like it offends me, i'd just rather not hear them talking about 'by the grace of god' and 'wishing you a blessed day' and 'a life filled with god's blessings' and shit like that.  


i think it also pisses me off a bit because if i talked about my gods and goddesses, someone would have something to say about it being offensive.  like they can talk about their monotheistic, judeo-christian god, but i can't mention my polytheistic neo-pagan gods and goddesses.  damn it.


i was considering asking the teacher if i could write my paper on religion.  but i figured it was a bit early in my college career to start really pissing people off.

freedom of religion... really?

as one who practices an 'alternative religion' (read: not judeo-christian in nature) i know i am a bit more sensitive to the ideas of religious freedom and the separation of church and state than your general american.  and the conservative/republican/GOP/fundies have turned this mosque at ground zero thing into a national news story... only because it's an election year.  you know i'm right.  don't try to deny it.

let's get a few things straight and out of the way before i get into this.  i am a neo-pagan.  i do not participate in any of the major three religions (which, in case you didn't know, are judaism, christianity, and islam.  that's right - muslims make up one of the largest religious groups worldwide).  i actually do not belong to any dogmatic religion, including wicca, because the 167 tenets are a bit much as far as i'm concerned. but that's another post for another day. 

i also am a new yorker.  i know, i know, i currently live in florida.  but while you can take a girl out of new york, you can't take the new york out of a girl.  i go back to new york three or four times a year, and am actually planning on moving back there because florida sucks an awful lot of floppy donkey dick.  i lived in new york on 9/11.  i could look down hempstead turnpike on long island and see the smoke from ground zero.  i saw the smoldering fires and searchlights of the rescue operation from the roosevelt island bridge.  i've seen the gaping hole that was left on manhattan island that day.  i had a friend who did recovery and clean up down there, and brought back stories and photos that i just couldn't believe.

now that we've gotten that out of the way, let's get onto that mosque 'at' ground zero.  it's not AT ground zero.  it's like three blocks away.  so that's my first point: it's not AT GROUND ZERO.  it's near it.  and do you know what else is near ground zero?  you may not, and instead of me telling you, let me link you to an article from someone who already did the legwork at gawker: The Hallowed Ground near the 'Ground Zero Mosque'.  check it out.  if you're too lazy to do so, i'll let you in on the secret:  within the same amount of distance from ground zero that the proposed mosque would be built, there is a mcdonalds, a burger king, an off track betting, a bar, a vitamin shoppe, and a gentleman's club. 

so, it's okay to get some supplements, a burger, and a lap dance, but not to worship allah within two or three blocks of ground zero. 

huh.

let me let you in on another little secret:  islam is one of the largest and fastest growing religions in the world.  most of you would say christianity is the largest religion - and you'd be right.  about 32% of the world is some form of christian.  but 22% are muslim - and that number is growing.  and jews?  they make up like 1%.  that is not a typo - ONE PERCENT.  i was surprised to learn that, but there you go.  here in the good old US of A, those are the three main religions.  actually, in most of the civilized world, those are still considered the three big ones because they are all monotheistic.  but again - that's another post for another day.  and just so you know, i got this info here: religioustolerance.org  those numbers are the most recent i can find, and are from 2001.

one of the founding principles of this country was religious freedom.  you may remember from history class that originally, we stole this land settled here to escape religious intolerance and persecution over there in england.  and now what are we doing?  we are being religiously intolerant.  it's sad, really.  and maybe it does bother me more because i belong to one of the groups that is still routinely persecuted.  but not all muslims are extremists - and that's who caused 9/11.  a bunch of radical muslim extremists who fucking hate us over here.  they hate us BECAUSE of our freedoms - like our religious freedom.

did you know there are other extremist groups?  like christian extremists?  there are.  the ku klux klan.  the christian identity movements.  the lambs of christ.  i think we're all fairly familiar with what the kkk has done/continues to do in this country with their doctrines of religious intolerance.  but the christian identity movement is basically a bunch of radical white nationalist or white supremacist 'christians' who hate needlessly, and includes the aryan nation group.  they basically believe that armageddon will be a big ass race war.  fun times.  and the lambs of christ are a super-pro-life organization... who have been linked to murder.  the most notable probably being when member james charles kopp killed ob/gyn barnett slepian in his home in buffalo, ny in 1998.  his crime?  what else - performing abortions.

are all christians racist, pro-life-willing-to-kill-ob/gyn fundies?  absolutely not.  should we never build a christian church near a temple or synagogue in case they decide to try and kill jews for being jews?  or not build churches near doctors offices housing ob/gyns?  of course not.  that's fucking ridiculous.  most christians are loving, caring, mostly tolerant, non-murdering citizens.  and guess what?  the same can be said of of muslims:  the vast majority of them are also loving, caring, mostly tolerant, non-murdering citizens.

and about newt gingrich and some other right wingers: this is NOTHING like building a memorial to hitler outside of auschwitz, as so many  have been saying publicly.  hitler was a man who represented a group of people who were hell bent on wiping a group of people off the face of the earth.  would building a memorial to bin laden near ground zero be like that?  yes.  yes it would be.  but they're now comparing muslims to NAZIS?!?!??!??!?! 

?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?

are you fucking SERIOUS!?! 

and let's remember that freedom of religion is a fucking constitutionally guaranteed right here in the USA.  and we have separation of church and state - so while it's wonderful that we can all have OPINIONS on this, peter king, gingrich, bloomberg, and patterson should keep their fucking fingers out of this pot and get on with business as usual.  hey, fuckwads, how about listening to anthony weiner and working on that 9/11 first responders compensation act??  instead of worrying about a fucking mosque going up completely legally and shit, why don't you all DO SOMETHING FOR THE MEN AND WOMEN WHO HELPED PUT THE FUCKING CITY BACK TOGETHER?!?!?!?! ASSHATS!!

anyway.

unlike the president, i can comment on the wisdom of building a mosque that near ground zero.  new yorkers are nothing if not opinionated, and i see many lawsuits in the future, lots of protesting, and possibly spitting on or the throwing of feces on muslims trying to worship at this proposed mosque.  with all this publicity, you can bet that the tourists will get in on the spitting-and-throwing-things too. 

maybe they'll get a lap dance first, like any good 'christian' would.

i say go forth and build your mosque in the general vicinity of ground zero.  and i'd like to think that building a place of worship this close to ground zero is actually an honor to the memory of those we lost that day.  i'd like to think that many of the muslims worshipping there may take some time out to remember the more than 3000 people who died that day, and pray for them and their families.  and maybe pray for the rest of the world to have a little more love and tolerance. 

i know that's something that i pray for on a regular basis.

UPDATE:  while i have not been able to find any documentation of a supposed opening date of 9/11/11, the washington post had a recent article about the center - they have not even picked an architect yet.  i can't imagine something like this being done in a year.

the washington post also states that park51 will 'house meeting rooms, a fitness center, a swimming pool, a basketball court, a restaurant and culinary school, a library, a 500-seat auditorium, a Sept. 11 memorial, a reflection space, and a mosque that could attract as many as 2,000 worshipers'.  full article here: washington post article.

the deep, dark abyss of religion

danger! danger! it's like a warning playing through my mind as i think about writing this post. there are certain things you never EVER discuss in polite company: politics and religion.

well. guess what? two of my absolute FAVE topics are politics and religion!

with the election of president obama, the nation seems to have become even more divided than it was years ago (i didn't know this was possible). and if any of you know me, listen to me, or have read my status updates on facebook, you'll know which side of that fence i'm on.

i'm not doing politics. srsly. i promise.

i was catching up on some blogs i read regularly, and got sidetracked by comments from other readers who also whore themselves out in comments. so i click on their blog links and read. and i got sucked into a whirling vortex of atheist and open spirituality blogs.

firstly, i found out that some - NOT ALL - but some atheists are just as pushy, assholish, and annoying as fundamentalist christians. they are very rude about your belief in ANYTHING and think anyone who could possibly be stupid enough to believe in a god is basically worthless.

secondly, i found out that many atheists don't seem to be able to articulate their thoughts very well. or in an organized manner.

thirdly, i found that people who claim to be spiritually open are actually pretty set in their ways. i'd think that would mean that one is open to all spiritual ways or religions. like, you may not practice one or any of them, but you know a bit about the major ones and are pretty cool with people who worship that way.

and finally, i found out that i am way too trusting and have too much faith in my fellow wo/man. many atheists seem to have the same kind of agenda as fundamentalist christians: they want to convert me to not believing in anything. like they need to convince a christian that their soul doesn't need to be saved. um.... hmm. kind of silly. it's like they're just lashing out against being brought up in one of the big three religions (judaism/christianity/islam). so, basically just like fundies, many atheists think THEIR way is the ONLY way.

huh.

religion is a personal, private thing to most people (not so much to me any more. love me or hate me, but if you're going to base your love/hate of me on MY BELIEFS?!? then good riddance) until they have the opportunity to teach someone something. maybe it's to teach them that not all christians are fundamentalist nutjobs. maybe it's to teach them that not all muslims hate everyone else. or maybe it's to teach them that witches do not eat babies, sacrifice cats or roosters, or worship satan.

because, honestly, i haven't eaten a baby in years now. they're terrifically fatty.

also, in my defense, i did eat a painkiller earlier tonight and may or may not be rambling.

i think the best part about religion is how it makes you feel. you know what? i don't believe that jesus died for my sins. but i think it's rad that he died for yours. and i bet many of you reading this right now don't think that rocks have spirits, but i totally do.

jesus is right for you, rocks are right for me. i don't shove my rocks down your throat (ha) so don't shove your god/s down mine. this is just a loose example, of course. i would never do something like waste my rocks by shoving them down your throat.

i think the best and worst part of the interwebs is that we can all have our say, and share it with other people. that's great. where it gets fucking sucky is how we use the internet to spread hate and belittle other people's beliefs and ideas. like i'm a fan of the white house page on facebook. EVERY FUCKING COMMENT that is left is super anti-obama. and like, great, that's your prerogative and your RIGHT as an american. but seriously? i joined because i dig all the sort of behind-the-scenes photos. that's it. i don't want to get sucked into reading your fundie bullshit. but i do. you know how that is - you swear you're just going to look at ONE PICTURE of a hedgehog in an ice cream cone (http://icanhascheezburger.com/2009/02/01/funny-pictures-licks-me-i-dare-ya/ - thanks chelsea) and then three and a half hours later, you've been through i can has cheezeburger, fail blog, there i fixed it, and most of engrish.

it's the same thing with those comments. i get sucked in and feel the need to tell people that i just want to look at the fucking pictures, if you want to argue and hate on gays and spout your biblical knowledge, find an appropriate venue to do such, and let me look at a photo of bo.

cause he's super cute.

but not as cute as that fucking hedgehog.