the slowest whirlwind ever

my whirlwind week/week and a half has been slow.  i've spent a large part of it sitting on my ass on the couch, some time at my desk, a few hours in the car, and two days at work with dad.  but a lot has happened.

well, not a lot.  it just feels like a lot.

so, at our last meeting, i had received my flu shot and met with my advisor.  i had no adverse reactions to the flu shot - just like a little knot under the skin that was a bit sore for a couple of days.

and then i reached out to the woman at school who sets up the internships.  and apparently in june new york state changed EVERYTHING in the mental health systems.  so now i can't take all three 'classes' for my practicum in one semester.  it's 300 hours and now we have to take them spread out over six months.  so two classes in spring and one in summer.  IF i can get into an internship.  because apparently it's hard to get into one.  fuck.  FUUUUUCK.

now the big problem here is the job that i accepted wants me to have my training certification ASAP so i can do billable work (like actually counseling people).  i can't get that certification until AFTER my practicum is complete.  so even if i can start right away in january, i won't be cert'd until june.  now i don't know what is going to happen.  but if you remember, i had turned down a full time reception job at another substance abuse center for this part time counseling job.

i'm trying not to stress about it, but part of my feels like dropping out of school and just getting another desk job.  it's like, why bother?  it's so expensive and it's such a hassle and, to be honest, i'll probably make more at a good desk job than as a counselor.  compared to my last desk job (data entry, customer service, reception) the counseling job is like a $5 an hour pay CUT.

yeah.  so i'm going to be making less money when i have to pay back all of my student loans.  excellent.

now on friday i had a tattoo appointment with one of my artists who moved to north carolina.  he does guest spots up in new york a few times a year, so i got in on that.  i had a small fairy that i wanted covered up because i want my right calf to be all traditional style tattoo work.  he got to work with a handful of sharpie markers and drew something up.  right on my leg.

this is just sharpies.  he drew it freehand.  and you can kind of see the black fairy with blue and purple wings that we covered up.

 now, i was 'in the chair' for three hours (i wasn't actually sitting.  i was lying down on my stomach with my leg out.).  it took a little short of an hour to do the outline and then about two hours for color.  he kept talking about putting a color splash behind it, but about 2:40 into the session i was hitting my wall.  this is what i ended up with...

follow my artists' awesome work on instagram @jonronzka

 i'm very, very happy with how it came out.  i still want to put a lighthouse somewhere on that leg, and i'm considering a compass and/or an anchor and/or a ship's wheel too.  but considering what happened the next day, i'm not too sure now.

some swelling is normal.  but omfg i am swelling A LOT.  it is so fucking painful to put my foot down after it's been up; all the blood rushing down is like a searing pain.  and then walking on it is horrible.  it's all the swelling.  here's what my feet look like today....

pretty easy to see which leg was tattooed.  i like how my right foot has absolutely no definition.  but i have a sweet ass cankle going on.  so, there's that.

generally, you don't ice tattoos.  some people think it's bad for the healing, some think it's bad for the ink.  it's just not usually done.  and seriously, on a tattoo this size with this much swelling, i don't think it would help.  i kind of feel like i want to prick holes in my foot and ankle.  it actually feels like it's full of crap and it's pressurized.  i still have redness around the tattoo itself - totally normal for me.  my last calf tattoo had redness for almost two weeks.  i have sensitive skin.

my inner calf tattoo took about 1:45 and i didn't have this much swelling.  none of the smaller tattoos i have on my calves swelled much at all.  so i think the moral of this story is 'don't have more than about an hour and a half of work done below the waist at a time'.  it's just too much trauma and irritation to my skin.

i was very interested to see how the healing process went since i'm on methotrexate (chemo).  my tattoo artist on long island did some touch up work almost three weeks ago and the healing seemed to go pretty normal for me.  maybe a teensy bit slower than normal, but my normal is so fucked up anyway.  i think it healed well.  which is nice because that was her test spot - hopefully now she can finish up my forearm.  we just have some touchups to do, a small starfish, and then background.  i'm very excited for it, but it will probably wait until after the holidays.  maybe.  we'll see.

i'm starting to get a bit nervous for the holidays.  we've saved up money each week to give to the 'kids'.  we have my twin sisters, two nieces, and two nephews who we still give gifts to.  they're getting cash.  so now i have to focus on buying something each week for one of the remaining people: my brother, my soon to be sister in law, my dad, the in laws.... oh, and maybe a little something for awesome husband @_antgas :)