are you there, goddess? it's me, stephanie.

one of my current classes is HUM/130 - religions of the world.  i was kind of stoked to take this class.

okay, REALLY stoked.  i love politely discussing religion and sharing my ideas and interpretations with other open minded people.  note that i said OPEN MINDED people.  that may be important later in the story.

well, it's not actually a STORY per se.  more just me bitching about things.  and stuff.

now, my class blocks are nine weeks long and i take two classes at a time.  week 1 in my religion class was 'effects of religion'.  we had to talk about psychologists and philosophers and their views on religion (waste. of. time. if you ask me). i got sad and angry because i lost A LOT of points on a project because the facilitator doesn't know how to properly pose a fucking question.  SUCH AS insinuates like examples.  discuss some bright colors SUCH AS pink, blue,  and yellow would mean discuss colors that are bright, like pink, blue,  and yellow are.  i could discuss whatever fucking color i wanted to.  discuss some bright colors INCLUDING pink, blue, and yellow would mean discuss pink and yellow you asshole.  the facilitator put SUCH AS so i discussed pink, purple, and lime green.  and she only gave me credit for pink and said 'i don't think you got the point of the assignment.  purple and lime green are interesting, but not what i asked for'. 

um, what?

so i was all like 'such as insinuates that you offered examples, etc'. like just what i typed up there.  she was all 'i'll consider it' and then gave me 28/30 instead of the original 14/30.

but still, i have an 88 in that class at that point.  which will COMPLETELY FUCK my 4.0.  i know, i know.  a 3.8 wouldn't kill me.  but if i'm going to do something, i'm going to DO IT and i want my damn 4.0.

so week 2 is indigenous peoples.  which is interesting to me because christianity all but wiped out most indigenous cultures worldwide. 

but don't tell christians that. 

there were actually 'classmates' of mine who were like 'indigenous people believed in many gods because christian God had not yet shown Himself to them'.

ergh... what?

so that is basically how my week 2 went.  slightly entertaining, very frustrating, and lots of rewriting responses to my classmates so i don't come off as hating christians (because i totes don't).

this week is week 3 and we're learning about hinduism, which is much more up my alley.  i'm a bit bummed that neo-paganism isn't touched on at all, but there was mention of 'new age'.  i'm desperately hoping that paganism and/or wicca isn't shoved in there as it usually is.

psychology class is much less frustrating.  it's more challenging to me, and i'm enjoying it even though i'm not doing perfectly.  i have like 94% in that class and am back up to 90% in religion, so if i really stick to it and try to get full credit on everything, i might eek out an A in each class. 

in other news, jake can't stop biting his butt and has to wear one of those hysterical collars now.  long story, expect photos though.  he had a wound back when we still lived in florida that was healing and then was not healing and then was healing and is now not healing again and he picks at it and chews at it.  so he's wearing a fashionable collar now that we're hoping to sign with sharpies like it was a cast in elementary school.

and finally, be prepared for the blog entry of all blog entries coming up soon.  i've been saving this since last april and we are nearing completion.  that ought to wet your collective whistles for a bit.  trust me, it will be worth it.

blessed samhain... that's halloween to most of you.

here we are at another halloween.  another october coming to an end.  target has fucking christmastime decorations up.  already.  seriously.  i was kind of shocked/pissed when i saw them today.  i mean IT'S NOT EVEN HALLOWEEN YET technically.

so anyway, while i think halloween is pretty neat, because i like candy as much as the next person (except for awesome husband, he really doesn't like candy at all.  he doesn't cry at 'the lion king' either, and these are two examples of why i think he may be an android) and dressing up is kind of fun.  but it's not just a hallmark holiday full of candy and overpriced polyester costumes for the kids.  it's also one of our (re: neo-pagans) high holidays - samhain.  i could give you a long, interesting description of what it is and why we celebrate it, but i'm sure most of you don't care.

oh, you do?  really?

well, then, that's a different story.

neo-pagans have eight holidays spaced throughout the year.  four are at the equinoxes and the solstices, four are at right in between those.  we refer to the holidays as the wheel of the year.  each holiday that passes is like the wheel turning.  samhain is kind of like the end of our year - it's often called the witch's new year.  at samhain, we mark the death of the god.  and, yes, we have gods and goddesses, and a lot of it is kind of figurative to many neo-pagans.  the sun is very symbolic of the god (the moon of the goddess) and the days are shorter now, the sun shines less.  at samhain, the god dies and passes on - only to be reborn again at yule (the winter solstice).

i bet you'll end up hearing a bit about that as we get closer, due to my irrational dislike of people saying 'it's merry christmas NOT happy holidays' because the majority of this country is christian. 

ANYWAY.  history tells us that at this time of year, before the winter frosts moved in but after the harvests were done, many farmers would make sure they paid up all their debts - by october 31st.  so neo-pagans tend to make sure we are paid up karmically - that we don't owe anyone anything, physically or otherwise.  and of course it deals with the death of the god.  us pagans love death - because with every death there is a new beginning.  so at samhain, it's common to want to rid ourselves of things we don't want to bring into the new year.  writing bad habits on paper and tossing them into a cauldron of fire (or a barbecue pit, if you prefer) happens more often than you'd think.  many witches will work magick on samhain to help themselves overcome shit like that in the new year.  it's a time for cutting away that which is temporary and looking to the future.

actually, most of our holidays are like that.  huh.

another common tradition among pagans at samhain is to set an extra place at the table for those we've lost this year.  this is because at samhain and beltaine (may 1st - six months from now) we believe the veil between this world and the other are the thinnest - which is probably where the idea of dressing up came from.  what better way to hide them from the witches and ghosts than to dress your children up as witches and ghosts!  which means that halloween is more of a christian invention, really.  pagans didn't dress up for halloween.  personally, i actually find it a bit distasteful, but i'm a super annoying pagan rights lunatic. 

so while i will probably be handing out a few kit kats and hershey bars tomorrow, i'll also be meditating on the coming year, and the things that i will leave behind in this year.  i will look forward to the new seeds i will sow this coming spring.  we may even light up the ol' cauldron (yes, i do have one.  it's small though) and do some banishing work.  all acts of love and pleasure are her ritual - and i will know that i am of the goddess, and she keeps me as the wheel turns, and turns, and turns again.

brightest blessings for love and light in the coming year.  namaste.

things that really crumble my cinnamon coffee cake.

i made a delicious (boxed) cinnamon coffee cake yesterday. DELICIOUS.  and i was enjoying it's orgasmic cinnamony sweetness when i noticed a facebook friend had posted a link to a youtube video about glenn beck's 8/28 'restoring honor' event.

don't worry, i'm not getting all glenn-beck-hatey on you today.  this is not a political cake-crumbling.

it's a religious one.

which is SO much better, i know.

ANYWAY.  the airspace over much of d.c. is restricted, including over the washington monument and mall area.  where the 'restoring honor' event was taking place.  however, a flock of geese flew over the mall during the event, and many people are taking this as a sign that god himself is 'pleased with our efforts to maintain truth and freedom for america.'

huh.  feel free to click or not click.  there are tons of different videos of this on youtube, but this is the one i saw.

many of the videos of the goose 'flyover' mention that it's the hand of god.  it's not a coincidence.  that god knows that the majority of this country is christian and trying to bring the country as a whole back to god.  etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.  insert whatever far right, superchristian bollocks you prefer.

please consider my numbered list as to why these geese are NOT demonstrating anything about a christian god, nor his/her approval/disapproval for glenn beck, christianity, washington d.c., republicans, democrats, etc.

1.  the area between the lincoln memorial and the washington monument is a long, straight, fairly open area.  so the winds there are probably really fun for birds to fly in.  the topography and buildings could cause air thermals and shit like that.  and seriously, even if it didn't, that is an epic flight path for any bird to take.

2.  these are CANADIAN geese.  even if a christian god was all like, 'dude, glenn beck is ON POINT and totally right, AMERICA FUCK YEAH!!' would he, in all his infinite wisdom and awesomeness, send some kind of AMERICAN bird to fly over?  preferably a bald eagle?  or at the very least, a flock of seagulls or pigeons?  some bird that is not specifically NAMED after a country that is not america?  

3.  also, geese like water.  there is a HUGE reflecting pool there.  maybe there were on their way migrating somewhere (not unheard of, that migration thing) and remembered there was a sweet ass spot to stop for a rest and a drink.  and changed their minds when they saw the people.  probably not, but i love canadian geese and like to think that they think like me.  HOWEVER.  geese fly in formation like that while migrating.  and canadian geese migrate north to south, stopping in the summer where it's cooler and stopping in the winter where it is warmer.  they do not have specific migratory paths or places they stop - it's different for each group of geese.  i think it's pretty obvious that these geese were on their way somewhere fun.

4.  if a christian god sends flocks of geese over places where things are going on that he approves of... like, if he specifically sent those geese to fly over the rally to say 'CHRISTIAN GOD APPROVED', then he TOTALLY loved my pagan handfasting/wedding.

that's right.  you might know i'm a pagan (and if you didn't, now you do) or witch or neo-pagan or whatever.  when i married awesome husband just over six years ago (our anniversary was like two weeks ago) we had an outdoor ceremony by a lake at sunset, because we're pagans.  we like shit like that.  we had a handfasting, which is basically a pagan wedding and our hands were tied together and i think it was really awesome and moving and even our 'enthusiastic' christian guests (read: born again) thought it was a touching ceremony (and didn't even question the 'god and goddess' thing).  

so, here we are, all pagan and shit, being handfasted and not believing in a christian god.  when a few geese fly over our wedding ceremony, honking the whole way, and land on the other side of the lake.  

SCORE!  CHRISTIAN GOD APPROVED MY NON-CHRISITAN/PAGAN WEDDING!

i'd like to see the religious glenn-beckers stick that in their pipes and smoke it (legally, of course).

in sort of related news, i also prayed to christian god in church about my religious future days before i came to paganism.  i was raised christian, and truly believe it's all the same shit with different names.  i went to church and knelt and prayed with all my heart because what the church was telling me just wasn't making sense and didn't feel right.  i had studied some other religions, mainly paganism and wicca, and asked christian god to show me what path i was supposed to be on, what path would sit well with me and give me comfort and allow me to try and experience life and love the way i was supposed to.  mere days later, someone handed me the book 'living wicca' by scott cunningham and before i even opened the book, it just FELT like a sign.  if you've never been aware of having a 'prayer' answered, it's a hard feeling to describe.  but i felt at that moment like christian god was telling me, 'dude, you're right - it's all the same.  this is the path that will resonate with you.'

and christian god, in his infinite wisdom and awesomeness, was right.

bet you didn't see that one coming, did you?  i have no problems with christianity - it's just not for me.  the problem i have with some christians is that they are not christians - they do not live as christ would have.  they are mean and hateful and judgemental, and what is worse is that they use their 'christian' values as a way to continue being mean and hateful and judgmental.

/endrant.

anyway, i have to go finish up my paper on the origins on body piercing.  deadlines and all that.  mom's going to new york for a job interview and she leaves tomorrow.  so tonight i'll be helping her pack and making sure that everything's good to go and quite possibly having a few drinks.

and eating more cinnamon coffee cake.

the deep, dark abyss of religion

danger! danger! it's like a warning playing through my mind as i think about writing this post. there are certain things you never EVER discuss in polite company: politics and religion.

well. guess what? two of my absolute FAVE topics are politics and religion!

with the election of president obama, the nation seems to have become even more divided than it was years ago (i didn't know this was possible). and if any of you know me, listen to me, or have read my status updates on facebook, you'll know which side of that fence i'm on.

i'm not doing politics. srsly. i promise.

i was catching up on some blogs i read regularly, and got sidetracked by comments from other readers who also whore themselves out in comments. so i click on their blog links and read. and i got sucked into a whirling vortex of atheist and open spirituality blogs.

firstly, i found out that some - NOT ALL - but some atheists are just as pushy, assholish, and annoying as fundamentalist christians. they are very rude about your belief in ANYTHING and think anyone who could possibly be stupid enough to believe in a god is basically worthless.

secondly, i found out that many atheists don't seem to be able to articulate their thoughts very well. or in an organized manner.

thirdly, i found that people who claim to be spiritually open are actually pretty set in their ways. i'd think that would mean that one is open to all spiritual ways or religions. like, you may not practice one or any of them, but you know a bit about the major ones and are pretty cool with people who worship that way.

and finally, i found out that i am way too trusting and have too much faith in my fellow wo/man. many atheists seem to have the same kind of agenda as fundamentalist christians: they want to convert me to not believing in anything. like they need to convince a christian that their soul doesn't need to be saved. um.... hmm. kind of silly. it's like they're just lashing out against being brought up in one of the big three religions (judaism/christianity/islam). so, basically just like fundies, many atheists think THEIR way is the ONLY way.

huh.

religion is a personal, private thing to most people (not so much to me any more. love me or hate me, but if you're going to base your love/hate of me on MY BELIEFS?!? then good riddance) until they have the opportunity to teach someone something. maybe it's to teach them that not all christians are fundamentalist nutjobs. maybe it's to teach them that not all muslims hate everyone else. or maybe it's to teach them that witches do not eat babies, sacrifice cats or roosters, or worship satan.

because, honestly, i haven't eaten a baby in years now. they're terrifically fatty.

also, in my defense, i did eat a painkiller earlier tonight and may or may not be rambling.

i think the best part about religion is how it makes you feel. you know what? i don't believe that jesus died for my sins. but i think it's rad that he died for yours. and i bet many of you reading this right now don't think that rocks have spirits, but i totally do.

jesus is right for you, rocks are right for me. i don't shove my rocks down your throat (ha) so don't shove your god/s down mine. this is just a loose example, of course. i would never do something like waste my rocks by shoving them down your throat.

i think the best and worst part of the interwebs is that we can all have our say, and share it with other people. that's great. where it gets fucking sucky is how we use the internet to spread hate and belittle other people's beliefs and ideas. like i'm a fan of the white house page on facebook. EVERY FUCKING COMMENT that is left is super anti-obama. and like, great, that's your prerogative and your RIGHT as an american. but seriously? i joined because i dig all the sort of behind-the-scenes photos. that's it. i don't want to get sucked into reading your fundie bullshit. but i do. you know how that is - you swear you're just going to look at ONE PICTURE of a hedgehog in an ice cream cone (http://icanhascheezburger.com/2009/02/01/funny-pictures-licks-me-i-dare-ya/ - thanks chelsea) and then three and a half hours later, you've been through i can has cheezeburger, fail blog, there i fixed it, and most of engrish.

it's the same thing with those comments. i get sucked in and feel the need to tell people that i just want to look at the fucking pictures, if you want to argue and hate on gays and spout your biblical knowledge, find an appropriate venue to do such, and let me look at a photo of bo.

cause he's super cute.

but not as cute as that fucking hedgehog.